He's a Kenyan

Cigar in mouth, dripping hot ash in the grass of the football field, barrel shaped Limbaugh put an arm on Obama's shoulders.

"You'll do great," the pundit said, puffing out an asthmatic cloud of smog.

Obama, standing out in the cold on the track in shorts looked at his competitors. "I don't see why I have to go through with this."

"The American people need to know," Rush replied. "They deserve to know. The race is to ensure that you, my Hawaiian friend, are . . uh . . . fit for office."

"Oh come on Rush," Obama complained, "an hour of basketball a morning doesn't count?"

Rush blew another grey smoke cloud into the cold morning fog. "Oh it helps, but this allows us to quantify. Get on the track!"

Obama took his place. Next to him was a Kenyan. And another Kenyan. Then it dawned on the President, they were all Kenyan. Obama looked at his competition in wonder. What stunt were the neocons pulling now?

Limbaugh pulled out a gun, pointed it straight in the air and pulled the trigger. The race had begun. Obama put his whole body into it, Nike sneakers propelling him forward with all his might. He found that he could stay with the pack, but was unable to pass the leader. And soon, it was all over. Fifth place.

"The results are in," Limbaugh said. "you were only point nine three seconds off from the lead. You are most assuredly Kenyan. The impeachment trial begins tomorrow."

Authors note: It actually sickens me that the neocons are pushing this ridiculous conspiracy on the President